If you got a bad day

Hang over finalists 2007

ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION

'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'.

The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano?'

'Yes, Father, it is.'

'And who was the girl you were with?'

'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation'

'Well, Jo ey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now.

Was it Tina Minetti?'

'I cannot say.'

'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'

'I'll never tell.'

'Was it Nina Capelli?'

'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'

'Was it Cathy Piriano?'

'My lips are sealed. '

'Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?'

'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'

The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, Jo ey Pagano, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself.'

Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, 'What'd you get?'

'Four months vacation and five good leads.

Fondling Fingers

A typical married couple was lying in bed one night. The wife had curled up ready to go to sleep and the husband put his bed lamp on to read a book.

As he was reading, he paused and reached over to his wife and started fondling her 'kitty'. He did this only for a very short while. Then he would stop, and resume reading his book.

The wife gradually became aroused with this. Thinking that her husband was seeking some response as encouragement, before going any further, she got up and started stripping in front of him.

The husband confused, asked, 'What are you doing taking all your clothes off?'

The wife replied, 'You were playing with my 'kitty', I thought it was foreplay to stimulate making love with you tonight. The husband said, 'No, not at all.'

Then the wife asked, 'Well what the hell were you doing then?'

To which the husband replied, 'I was wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in the book.'

The Baker's man can!

"Bakers Biscuits het 'n nuwe koekie ontwerp, CLITORIS CREAMS. Wees net gewaarsku! Een lek aan daai koekie, en jy vreet die hele doos op"

"CAUSE THE BAKERS MAN CAN"

Juffrou vra:

"Jannie maak vir my 'n sin met oordosis.

" Jannie:

"Juffrou ons is 12 kinders,en dit wys jou net hoe my pa oor doos is."

Cartoons

Good Advice

ASK YOURSELF THE FOLLOWING...


1. Do you drink too much?
2. Do you smoke too much?
3. Do you eat too much?
4. Do you go to night clubs and taverns every week?
5. Do you like wild strange women and men?



If your answer is YES to any of the above......

Catch that moment !

Crime wave

I need to warn you about a new crime wave hitting the country.

Last night I was attacked and forced to the ground. The guys pushed something into my pocket and ran away.

When I looked what it was, I saw it's a ticket to the next Springbok Cricket game.

Please be careful, these people are desperate to get rid of these tickets and will stop at nothing!